This is a true story of how we had gas supplied to our property in Needham in 2014. It is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Only some of the names have been changed to protect the innocent.
Celia, being more money-cautious,
looked at the price we were paying for our heating oil, together with the fact
that when energy prices were discussed on the news, it was only gas and
electricity that was covered; oil prices never got a mention.
I'll tell this story in the way of
a diary, as it's easier.
We were told to ring a British Gas
telephone number to arrange for the connection to the gas main in the road.
20 January: We received
a letter from the New Housing Connections Division of British Gas, together
with information sheets for the site manager, telling us that we had to fit a
U6 meter box to the property and that National Grid plc would come and excavate
all trenches required for the project.
28 January: While we
were out, a surveyor called from National Grid plc (I’ll call him Alan) and
looked at the job. He rang me at about 8.00 pm to say he had been to the
property. He recommended that we bought a meter box from
a local builders’ merchant, which he said would be easy for me to install. I ordered
this and it arrived a few days later.
I was a little apprehensive about
fitting the meter box without a lintel so I rang "my friend" Alan at
National Grid. He told me that these boxes were always fitted without a lintel
as, at the worst, there would only be one unsupported brick. No problem. So
with my trusty angle grinder, hammer and chisel, I cut a hole in the wall. The
box fitted neatly into the hole. As instructed by Alan, I liberally coated the sides
of the box with silicon filler/adhesive and pushed it into the hole. Whoopee, it
fitted like a glove.
Now for the next
stage.
12 February: I received a
letter from British Gas to Mr” Delwin
Smaigh”, whoever he is. This letter advised that to get our gas
account up and running, they needed our meter reading.
14 February: I rang
British Gas and explained that I hadn’t got a meter yet. I was told that I couldn’t have a new meter
until I had supplied the reading from the old meter. So I again told him that "I
HAVE NOT GOT A METER". The
operative told me that he could not proceed without a meter reading, so I asked
to speak to his supervisor. The
supervisor advised that the meter reading would be 0000. So I politely enquired
why, in that case, had they sent the letter. He said "Just ignore
it". I then asked him why I needed an account with British Gas, as I
intended to buy the gas from EDF. I was then told that I had to buy my first
month's gas from British Gas, and then I could change suppliers. I thought this
was odd so I rang EDF who told me, yes,
I had to go with British Gas as I had arranged through them for the gas pipe to
be fitted by National Grid. I then asked
"Could I have done this through EDF", and was told, yes, it would
have been possible if I had not already signed up with British Gas.
20 February: I had a phone
call from a gentleman who was from either National Grid or British Gas, I can’t
recall which (by this time I was beginning to lose the plot) to tell me that
the connection from the pipe in the road to the meter box would be done on 28
February. He then asked me what type of main was in the road. Thinking this was
a stupid question, (I now know it's not a stupid question) I answered "A
gas main". He then asked if it was high pressure, medium pressure or low
pressure. I asked "How do you
expect me to know?"
Right, everything was duly
organised and the gas pipe was scheduled for installation on 28 February,
the meter on 3 March and the heating engineer was booked for 10 March (Being a pessimist, I allowed a week for problems - only a week?
Silly boy.)
27 February: A lorry from Morrison’s
(not the supermarket, but contractors to National Grid plc) arrived and dropped
off some road signs and safety barriers.
28 February: Two men from
Morrison’s arrived to install the gas pipe.
Now, you may ask what was wrong with that. The answer is nothing YET.
There was an argument between the
two men. The one with the plan said that
the main was under the pavement, and the one with the metal detector said that
it was under the road. So they agreed that they would start with the pavement, as they had to dig
through it anyway. This they did - no
main, so they dug into the road where they found the main.
You may ask, “ So what's wrong with
that?”. I'll tell you. I’m sure you’ve heard the stories about the “wrong” type
of snow. Well, this was the “wrong” type of gas pipe. This was a metal pipe
which had leaked in the past, so a plastic pipe had been inserted into the
middle of it. The problem was that they needed a “window cutter” to cut into
the metal pipe so that they could connect to the plastic. This tool was on
another van. They had the wrong type of van.
In order to prevent confusion later
on, I will explain here that there are two distinctly different window cutters.
1. A window cutter
is the tool used to cut into the metal pipe, thus making a window in the metal
casing, through which you can see the yellow plastic pipe which carries the
gas.
2. A window cutter
is the man/woman who uses the tool in order to cut into the metal pipe.
I hope that's all clear, because it
wasn’t clear to National Grid/Morrison that you needed both.
The two men finished off the part
of the pipe installation from the hole in the road to my newly-installed meter box
and said a window cutter would come along with a window cutter and finish the
job.
Now here's a bit of legal stuff. National
Grid are obliged to seek permission from the relevant Council if they want to
dig up a road. They are given a window (here we go, another window) of four
working days to do the job and they MUST then reinstate the road within four
days or be fined.
5 March: A lorry
turned up with a load of hardcore and filled in the hole in the road. Great,
but how about finishing the job?
Later
in the day, two lorries turned up - one with the tools and the other with the
tarmac. The holes were filled in and rolled flat. Not a bad job, considering
that the hole in the road was going to be dug up again when the window cutter
arrived with the window cutter (Are you keeping up?).
When they
started to put the tools away, I asked who would be filling the hole in the
path on my property near to the garage. I was told that this wasn’t their responsibility,
as all they did was public roads.
Back
on the phone to Shirley at Morrison’s. She checked with the scheduler and
reported back that he was under the impression that both the holes on the
property had been made good, but he promised it would be done A.S.A.P.
5 March: A man from
Morrison’s arrived to take away the barriers around the now beautifully
tarmaced hole and started loading them onto a lorry. A second Morrison lorry
then turned up, and I recognised the driver as being the man who had delivered
the signs and barriers.
Now,
slow down, you've got it all wrong; it's worse than that.
I
went to talk to the delivery guy who said "Where's Holly Barn? We have an installation there tomorrow". I pointed down the road and said "Can you see that black building, that's
it".
So,
armed with this information I telephoned "my friend" Shirley. I
asked her if the crew who were attending Holly Barn tomorrow were aware that
the main was in the road, not in the pavement, and that they needed a window-cutting
tool and a window-cutting person. Shirley was delighted that I had been so
public-spirited as to ring her and let her know, thereby helping their
installation run smoothly.
I
said "Seeing that you are so grateful, how about when they have finished
that installation with the window cutter and the window cutter, can they come 178
metres down the road and do mine?". "What a good idea. I’ll see if that can be arranged”, she said.
Ten
minutes later Shirley rang back to say that the Council had given the go-ahead
to dig up the road again. The window cutter
and window cutter would cut my pipe after they had finished at Holly Barn. GRRREAT!
6 March: I had to
go into Harleston on the afternoon. As I
drove out of the drive, I looked up the road to Holly Barn and could see some men
were up there working. GRRREAT!
When
I got back home at five o'clock, I didn’t have a hole in the road and there was
no- one working at Holly Barn. They had finished before three o'clock. Celia
had checked.
7 March: I telephoned
Shirley and asked what had happened. She
said that she wasn’t aware that the job had not been done. She checked up on
this and returned my call. She advised that the scheduler had cancelled the
call because the Council had not given the go-ahead (in actual fact, the
Council had given permission). She asked me to leave it with her.
Shirley
rang back to ask if it would be all right under the circumstances to the job on
SUNDAY. " I said “ Yes, please. You mean to say that you can get a window-cutter
with a window-cutter?”. She said "YES".
To be continued..........
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